Homer and Schrodinger
by BettyHall223
Summary: A look into the lives of Homer the Dog and Schrodinger the Cat. Pure fluff.


_Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are not my property. No copyright infringement is intended._

A thunderstorm raged outside in the early morning as Homer and Schrodinger wandered through the house. Feeling hungry, they felt a wake-up call of their owners was necessary.

The door to the bedroom was almost closed so Homer pushed it open with his nose.

Entering the bedroom, Schrodinger raised up, put his front paws on the side of the bed and stretched his neck to look over the edge. Seeing two big lumps from his point of view, he jumped up on the foot of the bed. Standing very still for a moment with a front paw raised, he thought about which one he would try to wake up. Knowing that Samantha had loved him since he was a tiny kitten, he thought he would try to wake her first. He knew that she wasn't cranky in the mornings like Jack could sometimes be when awakened from a deep sleep.

Jack was on his back with one arm on his stomach and the other arm above his head. Samantha lay on her side facing Jack.

Schrodinger glanced back at Homer.

"Hurry Schro, I'm hungry."

Schrodinger crept through the narrow space between the sleeping humans and stopped, looking at Samantha. Easing closer to her, he tapped his head against her nose. Samantha sniffed but didn't move. He tried the maneuver again with a little more force. Samantha slowly opened her eyes, blinked a few times and started to grin as she petted his head.

"Hey, Schrodinger" she whispered. "Are you hungry, baby? Do you want to be fed?"

"Meow."

Samantha pushed herself up and picked him up, cuddled him close and gently petted his head.

Schrodinger began to purr. "Ahhhh, I could stay like this all day."

Homer sat down and watched. "Sure, Schro. You're cute, soft and cuddly. You always get all of Samantha's attention."

"But you're Jack's favorite, Homer" Schrodinger responded. "He seems to tolerate me just because Samantha loves me. If it wasn't for her, I'd be living on the street, out in the cold, having nowhere to go to get warm. Just the thought of that makes me shiver."

Samantha set Schrodinger on the bed as she glanced at Jack. Trying not to wake him, she eased herself off the bed and put on her robe.

She bent over to pet Homer and whispered "you hungry too, boy?"

"Why else would I be standing here?"

Schrodinger glared at her friend. "Homer . . . behave. Just give her a minute. You know, it's a good thing they can't hear us talk to each other, you'd be in a lot of trouble."

Picking up Schrodinger, Samantha walked into the kitchen with Homer following.

After petting Schrodinger for a few moments, Samantha set him on the floor. Walking to one of the kitchen cabinets, she reached for a bag of coffee, scooped some into the coffeemaker and turned it on.

Homer wagged his tail. "Hey, hurry up. I'm fadin' away to nothin' here."

Schrodinger stared at her canine friend. "You are so impatient."

Homer looked at Samantha and ignored the remark.

Waiting for the coffee to brew, Samantha talked to their pets. "Did you sleep well?" she asked as she bent over and petted Schrodinger's back and patted Homer's head.

"Yeah, we did. Now get on with it. I'm hungry."

Schrodinger stared at Homer. "Homer! Patience!"

Samantha straightened up, put one hand on her tummy, the other on her back and breathed a deep sigh.

Homer tilted his head. "Samantha's gettin' a little pudgy around the middle."

"Homer, she's going to have a baby. That's how female humans look when they're expecting."

"That means more competition for her and Jack's attention, Schro. They'll totally ignore us when this baby gets here."

"No, they won't. Why are you so insecure? They'll always love us. If they didn't, they wouldn't keep us around."

Samantha opened a cabinet door and got out two bags of pet food. She poured cat food into Schrodinger's bowl, dog food into Homer's and put them on the floor.

Samantha looked back at them. "Come and get it."

Homer went running to his bowl. "It's about time!"

As they began to eat, Samantha set down two bowls of fresh water beside them.

Jack wandered into the kitchen as the two friends were eating. They looked up from their food and watched as Jack put his arms around Samantha and gave her a long kiss.

Homer glanced at Schrodinger. "There they go again with all that kissy stuff. Oh please, we're trying to eat here. It's enough to make me gag."

"Homer, you don't have to watch."

"It's hard not to."

A few days later while Jack and Samantha were away, Homer chased Schrodinger through the house.

Schrodinger came around the corner of the living room first and jumped up on the back of the sofa.

"I told you so. I told you so. I knew I could run faster than you, Homer."

"If we were outside, Schro, I'd show you that I can run faster than you."

"I'm a house cat. Samantha won't let me go outside so I don't guess we'll get to find out."

"I'll race you one more time, Schro."

Schrodinger took a deep breath and jumped down to the floor. "Okay. Ready. Set. Go."

Taking off through the house again, they ran through the kitchen, under the dining room table, into Jack and Samantha's bedroom where Homer chased Schrodinger over the bed and back down the hall. Homer followed Schrodinger into the living room but Homer came around the corner a little too fast and clipped the edge of a table next to the sofa where a potted plant was sitting. The plant started to teeter as the two friends abruptly stopped and watched. The plant tipped a little too far and fell off the table, breaking the pot and scattering dirt across the floor.

Schrodinger looked at Homer. "Wow, are you in trouble."

Homer glared at Schrodinger. "Hey, it's not all my fault. If I hadn't been chasing you, this wouldn't have happened."

"You're the one who wanted to race one more time!"

"And you agreed to it!"

"Okay, okay. We're both at fault."

They stared at the broken pot, the plant and the dirt.

"They are not going to be happy with us when they get home, Homer."

"What do you think they'll do to us? You don't think they'll give us away do you?"

"I don't know. I hope not. I've never lived with anyone but Samantha. This is my home" Schrodinger said sadly.

Homer moved closer to Schrodinger. "It'll be okay, Schro. If you go, then I go with you. After all, we're buddies."

In the late afternoon, Homer and Schrodinger anxiously waited for Jack and Samantha to return. Homer sat by the window watching for Jack's truck to pull up outside.

Schrodinger watched as Homer suddenly stood up.

"Here they come!"

Homer ran to the fireplace and laid down in front of it, putting his head on his paws, trying to look relaxed and innocent.

Schrodinger quickly jumped up on the window ledge, lay down and turned his front paws inward, trying to appear as if he had been there all day.

The front door opened and in walked Samantha followed by Jack. He closed the door and stopped to glance through the mail.

The two friends laid very still.

Samantha stepped into the living room and came to a halt, looking down at the mess on the floor. "What happened here?"

Jack lay down the mail on the hallway table, walked toward Samantha and stopped.

They glanced at each other then stared at their pets.

Homer kept his head on his paws, but looked up and gave them his most innocent look.

Samantha crossed her arms. "Schrodinger."

Schrodinger slowly turned his head as if to say "what?"

Jack looked at Sam and shook his head. "I guess we'll never know which one is responsible. I'll get a trash can, the broom and the dust pan."

Samantha sighed. "I'll get the vacuum cleaner."

Homer and Schrodinger lay very still as Jack picked up all the pieces of the broken pot and placed them in the trash can. As Jack held the dust pan, Samantha swept as much dirt into it as possible. After using the broom, Samantha ran the vacuum cleaner to finish getting up the dirt.

As Samantha unplugged the vacuum cleaner, she stared at the guilty parties for a few moments and shook her head.

Homer looked at Schrodinger and gulped.

It was in the early hours of the morning. Homer lay asleep on the floor when he heard a noise, raised his head and listened.

He looked at Schrodinger, lying on the sofa. Schrodinger opened his eyes and sat up just as a light came on in the hallway and they heard Jack and Samantha talking.

"Homer, what's going on?"

"Beats me."

Just at that moment, Samantha came down the hall with Jack following closely behind, carrying a small suitcase.

Samantha was in her bathrobe. Bending over slightly, she held her hand to her side and walked slowly. She stopped and put her other hand on Jack's arm.

"Oh Jack, this hurts."

Jack put his arm around her. "I know, honey. Let's get you to the hospital."

Just as they got to the door, Samantha looked at Jack. "We need to leave food for Schrodinger and Homer."

Jack set down the suitcase. "Okay. Go on to the truck and I'll be there in a minute."

Samantha opened the door and walked outside.

Jack hurried to the kitchen as Homer and Schrodinger watched as he put food and water in their bowls. Running to the door, he picked up the suitcase, turned off the light in the hallway and closed the door.

"Wonder what that was about, Schro."

Schrodinger looked at Homer. "I don't know."

Just as the sun was rising, Schrodinger and Homer crept into the nursery and wandered over to the crib. Schrodinger jumped up on the changing table and stared down at the infant.

Homer stretched his neck to get a better look. "She's awfully tiny for a human."

"She's just a baby, give her time to grow. She's really cute. Just think, we'll get to be her playmates when she's old enough to walk."

Homer looked up at his friend. "Yeah, if we break something else, maybe they'll think she did it."

Samantha came into the nursery. With a smile on her face she picked up her daughter and sat down in the rocking chair and began to rock.

Jack came in and stood beside Samantha as he leaned over and kissed the baby on the top of her head.

Schrodinger sat down and watched. "Samantha will be a very good mother."

Homer laid down on the floor. "She's a mother to us, isn't she Schro?"

"Yes, she takes care of all of us. We're very lucky that we have a warm place to sleep, food to eat and a family who loves us."

"I couldn't agree more, Schro. I couldn't agree more.

The End


End file.
